I used to think I was laid back, take it easy, go with the flow kinda person. Lately I'm getting more uptight in certain circumstances.
I have one or two friends who can really buoy me up because they are just fun to be around and encouraging to talk to. One, especially, who is very good at giving me pep talks and always leaves me feeling loved. Another who won't let me believe the lies the enemy whispers in my ears. I also have a pastor who doesn't shy away from addressing the difficult issues of life and the complicated subjects in scripture. I have a husband who does more than his share of "the work of the marriage" (read: chores) and supports me in the idea of working from home.
Yes, that is a new idea. I don't think I've talked about it here. I can't remember.
I've proposed to my boss that I work from home. That way, I can be here when my son leaves and when he comes home. I can run the laundry. I can have repairmen in to do the necessary maintenance. I can go to appointments and work in the evening to make up the time. Could it be that life could be so great?
I would miss the interaction at work. I do get jazzed up by being with people. I love the interaction around the lunchroom table - the other women in the office - about 5-6 of us who connect for that sparkling half hour of sharing stories and laughing. We have some great story tellers, who even in their grief and disappointment can see the lighter side of the issue.
Perhaps, though, it is more a case of "if I don't laugh, I'll cry." Like this weekend. Being reminded I'm nearing 50 - something that never bothered me before, but the fact that I've started "getting" the jokes about seniors, and parts of my body are starting to not cooperate, and my vocal stylings just not quite matching the type of music they want me to sing at church. That was just downright depressing.
But on a positive note: I'm really, really good at harmonizing.
You know it's going to be a bad year when, at your last physical, the doctor orders your first mammogram and then adds on an order for a colonoscopy and tells you he's ordered a followup MRI for that odd growth on the left ovary. Sigh.
(Had to throw that in to balance off the "good news, bad news" pattern.)
So... how do I stay positive except to focus on the source of true power. Oswald Chambers put it this way:
If you want to know the power of God (that is, the resurrection life of Jesus) in your human flesh, you must dwell on the tragedy of God. Break away from your personal concern over your own spiritual condition, and with a completely open spirit consider the tragedy of God. Instantly the power of God will be in you. "Look to Me." (Isaiah 45:22). Pay attention to the external Source and the internal power will be there. We lose power because we don’t focus on the right thing. The effect of the Cross is salvation, sanctification, healing, etc., but we are not to preach any of these. We are to preach "Jesus Christ and Him crucified" ( 1 Corinthians 2:2 ). If I share my own words, they are of no more importance than your words are to me. But if we share the truth of God with one another, we will encounter it again and again. We have to focus on the great point of spiritual power— the Cross. If we stay in contact with that center of power, its energy is released in our lives.
And what is more powerful than one who gives up his life for another. That is love.